Headed for nothing both ways

I think I know but I'm not sure that I know
Can you lose what was once inside of you?
So close before to the understanding
It leaves me thinking I know less than before
I used to hold on to answers but they slip through my hands like holograms
What if they're all holograms?
Sent down from the mothership trying to trick me?
I can be that foolish.
I can believe in beauty, it's easy that way.
The spiritual fox.
Everyone has their hard thing and mine has me fading away into the nothingness.
If you're doing it right you're headed for nothing and if you are wrong the result is the same.